I'm 62 And My Boyfriend Mooches Off Of Me

The caller is 62, her boyfriend is 51. They each own their own homes and pay their own expenses. He stays at her house about four nights a week. She wants him to contribute to rent or household costs. He refuses. They have been fighting about it for years.

Dave Ramsey cannot put himself in her shoes. He says so directly: "I can't put myself there because I wouldn't be in your situation." He would either get married or break up with someone who disrespects him that much. But the caller says marriage is off the table because her boyfriend does not want to remarry. He also does not want to pay any expenses. He believes taking her out to dinner once a week is sufficient.

The real issue is not the money

Ramsey reframes the entire argument. He tells the caller that asking for rent is a workaround for something deeper. She is not really fighting about dollars and cents. She is fighting for a sign of commitment. She wants to know whether they are doing life together. The boyfriend has been clear: they are not. He will not marry her. He will not let her dogs in his house. He will not move closer to her job. He will not combine households. He will sleep at her place four nights a week and take her to dinner once a week. That is the full extent of what he offers.