Caller: “My Husband Regrets Having Our Baby”

A caller on the Dr. John Delony Show describes a painful and unusual situation: her husband has told her he regrets having their baby because the child might one day reject Christ and spend eternity in hell. She asks how to honor his spiritual concerns while also challenging a way of thinking that is causing real harm in their marriage and home.

The Real Problem Is Not Theology

Dr. Delony immediately reframes the issue. The husband’s statement about eternal damnation is not a theological position to be debated. It is a symptom of a deeper, more pervasive anxiety. Delony asks the caller whether her husband has similar patterns of being paralyzed by large, existential fears—economic collapse, world war, political turmoil. She says this is the first time she has heard such a statement, but she adds that her husband does have a deep fear of standing before God and being told his life was wasted.

Delony identifies the core dynamic: the husband wakes up every morning trying to do everything perfectly because he is terrified of being rejected. He treats God the way he fears his wife will treat him—as someone who will look at him and say, "I hate you." This fear-based approach to relationship, Delony argues, completely misses the point. "It's a way to miss out on the beauty of relationship," he says. "It completely misses the exchange of love."