"My Fiancée Wants a Hysterectomy"

A 33-year-old man called in because his fiancée, with whom he has two young daughters, plans to have a hysterectomy next year. She has debilitating periods and has already been through significant medical challenges — she was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, went through TMS therapy, and is now off medication. The caller's central conflict: he always imagined having a son, and closing the door on more children means that particular dream will never happen. But he also knows he wants to honor her body and her choice.

The real question: grief, not negotiation

Dr. John Delony quickly cut through the surface problem. The caller wasn't asking how to change his fiancée's mind or find a secret conversation that would fix things. He was wrestling with grief. "I had this picture of my life and that picture's gonna be different," Delony said. The caller agreed — he had imagined since high school having at least one boy and one girl. He has two girls he loves deeply, but letting go of the third child he hoped for, especially the son he imagined, felt like losing something real.