The Art of Saying No: Ryan Holiday’s Office as a Stoic Workshop

The most important object in Ryan Holiday’s office isn’t a rare book or a piece of ancient art. It’s a sign that simply says “no.” The sign originally hung in Dr. Oliver Sacks’s office, and Holiday keeps it between two pictures of his children. The lesson came from sports psychologist Dr. Jonathan Fader: “You develop a career by saying yes to everything, but you can only keep a career by getting good at saying no to things.” Fader explained that in the Dominican Republic, baseball players say you don’t walk off the island—you get there by swinging at pitches. But once you reach the majors, you have to learn pitch discipline. Holiday applies this directly to his own life: every time he says yes to something, he is saying no to his children, to whom he has already promised his best time and best self. He keeps a second reminder from cartoonist Hugh McLeod—a drawing of someone taking a loved one for granted—and three memos from Harry Truman’s administration showing how the president politely declined requests. One of Truman’s replies reads simply: “Your question will be answered in the book I am getting ready to publish as soon as possible. So let the books do the answering for you.”

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