What To Do If Your Doctor Gaslights You | Dr. Bayo

August 2, 2026

AI Summary

5 min read

Dr. Bayo, a board-certified family medicine physician, nearly died after a C-section when a nurse repeatedly dismissed her concerns that something was wrong. She pressed her call button four times. Each time, the nurse said her vital signs looked fine and she was fine. Dr. Bayo was bleeding internally. She survived only because her husband called her obstetrician directly. The experience, she says, “strips me from the inside out” to share, but she does it because if a doctor can be gaslit in her own hospital, anyone can.

The roots of dismissal

Dr. Bayo traces medical gaslighting to two overlapping problems. The first is a historical legacy. She points to Dr. J. Marion Sims, the father of modern gynecology, who operated on enslaved Black women without anesthesia but used it for white women. That history, she argues, has not faded. A 2016 study found that medical students believed Black patients feel less pain than white patients, and a 2021 NIH study showed it takes 17 years for new clinical evidence to become standard practice. The second problem is more immediate: clinicians overestimate their ability to judge a patient’s experience. Dr. Bayo’s nurse told her she “didn’t look like” someone in distress. When Dr. Bayo later asked the nurse what pain does look like, the nurse had no answer. “There wasn’t any reflection happening,” Dr. Bayo says.

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What you'll learn

1 (04:00) **Dr. Bayo's Origin Story** - Dr. Bayo explains how watching her WWII veteran father be dismissed at the VA inspired her to become a doctor who advocates for patients.
2 (10:00) **Learning Differences & The "Chaos Brain"** - Dr. Bayo and Doctor Mike bond over needing high-stimulus environments to focus, challenging the idea that learning disabilities are always a weakness.
3 (15:00) **Smiling Through Residency** - Dr. Bayo describes how her naturally happy demeanor was met with skepticism and even a bet that she wouldn't stay that way through residency.
4 (20:30) **The Empath Doctor's Burnout Strategy** - Dr. Bayo reveals how she manages the emotional weight of medicine by working in different settings and taking five minutes alone in her closet each morning.
5 (26:43) **Why Family Medicine** - Dr. Bayo explains her love for family medicine, emphasizing the gift of continuity and the importance of not being pigeonholed into one specialty.
6 (29:00) **The "Old Lady Smell" Diagnosis** - Dr. Bayo shares a powerful case where her curiosity and refusal to accept "it's just old age" led to a cancer diagnosis.
7 (32:38) **Teaching Residents to Check Their Assumptions** - Dr. Bayo outlines her technique for helping medical students recognize their own biases before entering a patient's room.

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Show Notes

I'll teach you how to become the media's go-to expert in your field. Enroll in The Professional's Media Academy now: https://www.professionalsmediaacademy.com/Listen to my podcast, The Checkup with Doctor Mike, here:Spotify: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/spotify/CheckUpSpotifyApple Podcasts: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/applepodcast/ApplePodcastsHuge thanks to ⁨@Dr_Bayo⁩ for joining me on this episode. Check out her website https://clinicianswhocare.com/ to find doctor or nominate one you like!00:00 Intro01:36 Her Start In Medicine21:42 Family Medicine27:39 Bias Against Pain33:00 Power Dynamics38:20 She Almost Died48:10 Bias Against Black Women55:10 Medical Gaslighting1:07:38 MAHA / Private Equity1:26:14 Clinicians Who CareHelp us continue the fight against medical misinformation and change the world through charity by becoming a Doctor Mike Resident on Patreon where every month I donate 100% of the proceeds to the charity, organization, or cause of your choice! Residents get access to bonus content, and many other perks for just $10 a month. Become a Resident today:https://www.patreon.com/doctormikeLet’s connect:IG: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/instagram/DMinstagramTwitter: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/twitter/DMTwitterFB: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/facebook/DMFacebookTikTok: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/tiktok/DMTikTokReddit: https://go.doctormikemedia.com/reddit/DMRedditContact Email: [email protected] Producer: Doctor MikeProduction Director and Editor: Dan OwensManaging Editor and Producer: Sam BowersEditor and Designer: Caroline WeigumEditor: Juan Carlos Zuniga* Select photos/videos provided by Getty Images *** The information in this video is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information, contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/health professional **