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5 min readPeter Qvortrup Geisling on life force, loss, and the need to give
The Danish TV doctor Peter Qvortrup Geisling once received a question from a guest who noticed something odd: among the many photographs displayed on his old Yamaha grand piano, there was no picture of his father. Geisling, whose father died suddenly in 1984 at age 55, could not explain why. He called a friend, who told him: "It's because you have an inner picture that is so strong that you don't need a physical picture." That moment remains, by his own account, the only time in his life when he could not find an honest answer on his own — and the only time he can remember being genuinely surprised by something he discovered about himself.
A reluctance to talk about oneself — and why it matters
Geisling opens the conversation by confirming a prejudice the host Sørine Godfredsen holds about him: that he prefers to talk about other people's problems rather than his own. He agrees without hesitation. The reason, he says, is that he cannot remember the last time he said something about himself that surprised him. "I know the answer already," he explains. Talking about oneself feels uninteresting because it yields nothing new. He compares it to writing an essay in school when you already know the story you want to tell — the act of writing it down feels like an unnecessary detour.
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What you'll learn
- 1 (01:48) **The Prejudice: Reluctance to Talk About Himself** - Peter admits the host's prejudice is accurate: he prefers talking about others' problems because he rarely surprises himself when speaking about his own life.
- 2 (05:39) **A Rare Self-Surprise: The Missing Photo** - Peter recounts the only time he couldn't find an honest answer about himself, triggered by a question about his deceased father.
- 3 (08:09) **On Being Average and Feeling No Envy** - Peter describes himself as unremarkable in school and sports, but genuinely happy for others’ successes.
- 4 (10:07) **A Defining Childhood Moment: Speaking Up** - Peter recalls a school election meeting where he challenged a speaker, sensing his parents’ mixed pride and caution.
- 5 (12:13) **The Host’s Warning Sign: Realizing Fragility** - The host shares her own childhood moment of realizing “everything can wobble” when seeing her father bandaged after eye surgery.
- 6 (13:47) **Father’s Death: The Phone Call and Aftermath** - Peter describes his father’s sudden death from a heart attack, the phone call from his mother, and his immediate shift into action.
- 7 (16:10) **Comforting Others: The Philosophy of Loss** - Peter shares his approach to consoling the bereaved: the more sorrow, the more the person meant; and that you never truly lose a person because you can pull them forward in memory.
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Guests on this episode
Show Notes
Tv-lægen Peter Qvotrup Geisling gider ikke tale om sig selv, fordi han kender sig selv så godt, at han kun én gang i sit liv har fået et spørgsmål, han ikke allerede kendte svaret på. Han kender ikke til jalousi eller den dybere smerte, som livet også medfører. Han mener, at livet er 90 procent godt. Det står i kontrast til Sørine Gotfredsen, der selv kender til de mørkere og mindre flatterende sider af sit sind. Præsten og lægen ser også forskelligt på verden, når det kommer til, hvorfor vi eksisterer og troen på et efterliv. Og så kommer de ind på, hvordan det er at være barnløs i en sen alder. Noget som Peter Qvortrup Geisling valgte at gøre noget ved og få et barn med sin ekskæreste.
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