Katrine Marie Guldager

February 29, 2024

AI Summary

5 min read

At 21, Katrine Marie Guldager watched her best friend Anne die, shot on an open street in Managua, Nicaragua. A few years later, her father died in a train crash. In this conversation with Sørine Godfredsen, Guldager—a celebrated Danish author whose recent trilogy follows angry, disappointed middle-aged women—describes how she learned to live with grief she could not fit inside herself, and how she eventually found a kind of reconciliation not through forgiveness or family reunion, but through writing, psychoanalysis, and a surprising feeling of being blessed in a church she does not fully believe in.

The split self and the inability to feel

Guldager’s early life was shaped by the fluid, open structures of a 1970s collective called Sættedammen, where the slogan was “a child should have 100 parents.” For Guldager, who describes herself as nervous, introverted, and conservative as a child, this was not liberating. Boundaries were unclear, marriages were open, and deep parental commitment was diffuse. She felt she was “a bit in the way.” Her father offered a safe anchor after the divorce, but when he died, something in her fractured. She recalls a “spalting”—a splitting—where one part of her was fast and strong, continuing with the practical demands of young adulthood, while another part lay completely still and unreachable. She could not “live in her own mind” or inhabit he

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What you'll learn

1 (00:34) **Introducing Katrine Marie Guldager** - The host, Sørine Godfredsen, introduces the guest, a Danish author known for her trilogy about middle-aged women, and presents the opening question about giving in to find comfort.
2 (02:06) **The Host's Prejudice** - Katrine reads the host's prejudice: "You are a person who finds comfort in not thinking too beautiful and hopeful about life." She disputes this, linking her characters' anger to a disappointment that something could be prettier.
3 (03:29) **Childhood in a 70s Commune** - Katrine describes growing up in Sættedammen, a commune with the slogan "a child should have 100 parents," and recalls feeling nervous, introverted, and conservative, craving the security of a simple nuclear family.
4 (05:31) **The Pressure of Being a "Genius" Child** - The 70s philosophy that children are geniuses led to a lack of guidance and deep parental commitment, creating a sense of loneliness for her.
5 (07:21) **The Safe Relationship with Her Father** - After her parents' divorce, she moved in with her father, who provided a foundation of love and faith in her, in contrast to her more unhappy mother.
6 (08:57) **A Friend and a Political Awakening** - She befriended Anne, a young communist, and was drawn to the revolutionary dream of changing the world, feeling a connection to the weak.
7 (11:04) **Discovering Strength in Nicaragua** - On a trip to Nicaragua with Anne, Katrine discovered a strength in being alone and organizing, feeling more in her element than in diffuse emotional situations.

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Guests on this episode

Sørine Godfredsen

Show Notes

På en uge mistede forfatter Katrine Marie Guldager både sin veninde Anne og sin far. Veninden blev skudt på åben gade i Nicaragua, mens faderen døde i en togulykke ved Sorø. Alligevel mærkede hun livskraften stærkest, da hun sad i kapellet alene med sin afdøde veninde. Dette skete i foråret 1988, men tragedien fortsatte for den 21-årige Katrine Marie Guldager, da faderens død udviklede sig til en arvestrid, som endte med at hun afbrød kontakten til sin mor, søster og hele faderens familie. I dag er Katrine Marie Guldager 57 år og har forsonet sig med at ikke alt skal forsones.