Does Orthodox Judaism Have a Fear Problem? Rethinking Religious Anxiety Before Rosh Hashanah, with Rabbi Dr. Judah Goldberg (304)
September 7, 2026
AI Summary
5 min readDoes Orthodox Judaism Have a Fear Problem?
Rabbi Dr. Judah Goldberg opens with a confession: the Yamim Noraim of his youth left a strong imprint. The prayers were magical and inspiring, but the dominant theme could be summed up in four words—who is going to live and who is going to die. He felt that the more he shuddered about that question, the more likely he would emerge intact. And he suspected that if he was not nervous enough, he ought to be. Looking back, he wonders whether this is a good foundation for a religious life, and whether the dread many Orthodox Jews feel during the High Holidays reveals something deeper about the religious culture they have built.
The Case Against Fear as a Religious Motivator
Goldberg is not arguing against judgment or accountability. What troubles him is the appeal to fear as a primary motivator. He points to clear rabbinic sources: teshuvah mei'ahavah (repentance out of love) is preferred over teshuvah mi'yirah (repentance out of fear). The Rambam's closing chapter of Hilchot Teshuvah states that a person should not serve God for the sake of reward or refrain from sin to avoid punishment; the ideal is avodah mei'ahavah, worship out of love, the way Avraham Avinu served God.
Continue reading the full summary in the app — free to try.
Read Full Summary →Free • No credit card required
Never miss an episode of Orthodox Conundrum
Get every new episode summarized in your inbox — free, ~5 minutes to read.
No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.
What you'll learn
- 1 (02:38) **Opening the Problem – Fear as a Religious Culture** - Scott introduces the episode’s core question: what if the anxiety many feel during the Yamim Noraim reflects a deeper problem in Orthodox culture, not just individual temperament?
- 2 (06:50) **Why Fear Is the Suboptimal Motivator, Textually and Psychologically** - Rabbi Dr. Judah Goldberg explains that rabbinic sources (Sifrei, Rambam) clearly prefer repentance out of love over fear, and that fear-based worship is inherently self-centered and preoccupied with personal survival.
- 3 (08:56) **Scott’s Challenge: Isn’t Dread Exactly What the Days of Awe Demand?** - Scott pushes back, arguing that Judaism isn’t about feeling good and that fear of judgment might be a high spiritual level for many people.
- 4 (14:25) **The Deeper Fear Behind Our Reliance on Fear** - Judah responds that the impulse to use fear as a motivator is itself grounded in anxiety; he argues for a leap of faith that people naturally seek good when offered a love relationship.
- 5 (16:30) **Love Over Fear, Not a Balance – The Unstable “Anxious Relationship”** - Judah clarifies that Hazal do not prescribe a mix of love and fear; a relationship with both is psychologically unstable (anxious attachment), while the ideal is awe that grows out of selfless love, as with Avraham.
- 6 (20:36) **The Hidden Curriculum of Fear in Orthodox Education and Culture** - Scott describes how the “hidden curriculum” in yeshiva and sermons often transmits a message of conditional acceptance and dread, even when not explicitly stated.
- 7 (22:39) **Attachment Theory: Anxious vs. Secure Relationships with God** - Judah introduces Robert Yakov Danishevsky’s work on attachment theory, explaining that Judaism idealizes a secure attachment to God – unconditional love and acceptance – and that cultural anxiety about survival can create an anxious religious style.
+ Full timestamped outline available in the app
Show Notes
Check out Orthodox Conundrum Commentary on Substack and get your free subscription by going to https://scottkahn.substack.com/ - and members get this and other episodes of the Orthodox Conundrum Podcast ad-free and with early access and additional bonus content!
Fear can be a powerful religious motivator. It can push us to repent, reinforce commitment to halakha, and help communities maintain standards from one generation to the next. But what happens when fear becomes part of the culture of Orthodox Judaism itself?
As Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur approach, Scott speaks with Rabbi Dr. Judah Goldberg about the anxiety that often accompanies the Yamim Noraim, and about what that anxiety may reveal about Orthodox life throughout the year. They discuss the hidden messages we transmit through education, the role of charismatic religious authority and Daas Torah, whether our fear of losing religious commitment causes us to rely too heavily on fear itself, and what it would mean to build a religious culture grounded instead in love, trust, awe, and a secure relationship with God.
But there is a genuine risk on the other side as well: if we deemphasize fear and stress God's unconditional love, might commitment to halakha suffer?
This is a conversation about much more than how to feel differently on Rosh Hashanah. It's about what motivates Orthodox Jews, what kind of relationship with God our communities are trying to create, and what we might gain, or lose, if we choose trust over fear.
Talli Rosenbaum and I have just released Intimacy and Sexuality for Emerging Adults, powered by Intimate Judaism - a new ten-part podcast series designed to give young Jewish adults the kind of honest, thoughtful and Torah-based guidance about relationships, sexuality, and intimacy that too many of them simply aren't getting.
We talk about emotional intimacy and vulnerability, dating and physical boundaries, attraction and sexual desire, anatomy and sexual response, consent and communication, pornography, love and marriage, niddah and building intimacy within marriage, some of the difficult questions surrounding sexual orientation and Torah, and more.
All ten episodes of Intimacy and Sexuality for Emerging Adults are available now; just click here to get it on Spotify or Apple.
Please listen to and share this podcast, and let us know what you think on the Orthodox Conundrum Discussion Group on Facebook (htt
More from this podcast
Orthodox Conundrum →