OBITCH sittin with the devil!

“If you're reading this, I'm dead. I'm sorry to announce my passing. Some said it's about time, and others said I'll miss him. He was fun to be around.” That is how Paul John Dixon, a retired Canadian doctor and golf enthusiast, chose to announce his own death in a self-written obituary that delighted the hosts of OBITCHUARY. The episode weaves together several distinct threads—a near-death mix-up at an Arizona hospital, a pair of family drama “Am I the Asshole” letters, the folklore of “devil’s chairs” in cemeteries, and a 171-year-old riot in Toronto that started when clowns beat up firefighters at a brothel.

The toddler who wasn’t dead

The episode opens with a news story that broke in early July 2026: an 18-month-old Arizona boy named Vincent Lorenzo Fior Delino was pronounced dead in a hospital emergency room on Super Bowl Sunday after a near-drowning, only to be found breathing in the morgue nearly six hours later. The doctor who made the call allegedly told a questioning police officer, “Please do your thing and let me do my thing. I went to medical school for a reason.” A nurse had noted the child was still gasping but dismissed it as “agonal breathing.” The child survived and has been released, but the Maricopa County Attorney’s Office is investigating, and prosecutors have recommended charging the parents with child abuse—both admitted to smoking marijuana the mor