#1056 - Dr Paul Eastwick - Did Evolutionary Psychology Get Dating All Wrong?
February 7, 2026
AI Summary
5 min read🎙️ The Expert & The Context
- The Voices: Interview between host Chris Williamson (Modern Wisdom podcast, informed by evolutionary psychology) and guest Aaron Powell.
- The Credibility:
- Guest: Aaron Powell, scholar of close relationships in social and personality psychology; researches attachment, compatibility, and real-world mating dynamics via speed dating, longitudinal studies, and meta-analyses; author of upcoming book Bonded: An Evolutionary Perspective on Why Humans Form Relationships (Feb 2024).
🔭 The Executive Hook
- The Breakthrough: Consensus on "mate value" (e.g., hot-or-not ratings) fades rapidly with repeated exposure, as individual compatibility drives diverging perceptions, debunking the rigid "mating market" hierarchy.
- The Impact: Shifts dating from online swiping/bar scenes (high competition, initial attraction bias) to repeated group interactions (e.g., classes, work), boosting pairing odds for non-"tens" and fostering stable bonds via idiosyncrasy; counters modern singledom by reviving ancestral small-network mating.
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What you'll learn
- 1 (00:00) **🎙️ Introduction: Aaron Powell (Matt), Relationship Scientist**
- 2 (02:14) **Critique of Classic Evolutionary Psychology**
- 3 (03:48) **Problems with "Mating Market" Concept**
- 4 (05:48) **Attractiveness Consensus Fades Over Time**
- 5 (09:01) **Initial Attraction vs. Repeated Interactions**
- 6 (12:40) **Modern Dating Mismatch and "Office +2" Effect**
- 7 (16:41) **Assortative Mating and Mismatches**
+ Full timestamped outline available in the app
Show Notes
Dr Paul Eastwick is a psychologist, professor, and a researcher.
Much of what we think we know about relationships comes from an evolutionary psychology lens, but what if that framework is flawed? In his groundbreaking new research, Dr Paul Eastwock challenges long-held assumptions, turning evolutionary psychology on its head. So where did it go wrong, and what new models replace it?
Expect to learn where the Evo Psych community may have been wrong about mating and relationships, the biggest problem with the term “mating market”, how accurate people’s opinions are and ideas at their “type” or mate preferences, what men find appealing in women and visa versa, what Paul’s definition of attachment in adulthood via safe haven (support in adversity) and secure base (support in growth) is, why masculinity needs reimagining and much more…
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