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How to speak more confidently and persuasively | Matt Abrahams (professor, podcast host, author, speaker)

March 31, 2024

AI Summary

5 min read

Matt Abrahams, a Stanford communication professor, podcast host of Think Fast, Talk Smart, and author of Think Faster, Talk Smarter, shares techniques to reduce public speaking anxiety and improve on-the-spot communication like Q&A, feedback, toasts, and apologies. Drawing from psychology research and his teaching, he emphasizes that anxiety is normal and universal—even pros feel it—and skills improve through mindset shifts, body-based interventions, and repeatable structures.

Reducing Anxiety Before and During Talks

Anxiety stems from fight-or-flight arousal and negative self-talk, but the body uses one main arousal response, which can be relabeled as excitement to relax speakers and improve perceived performance (per Alison Wood Brooks' research). Visualization desensitizes by mentally rehearsing the full event—approaching the stage, speaking, audience response, exit—like athletes do, backed by 1980s University of Oregon studies; pair it with deep breathing. "Dare to be dull" frees cognitive bandwidth by prioritizing connection over perfection, treating the brain like a CPU overloaded by self-judgment. Mantras like "I have value to add" or "Last time went well" counter catastrophizing. Embodied cognition techniques work quickly: exhale twice as long as inhale to trigger relaxation (rule of lung), or say tongue twisters for presence and voice warm-up. Distract early by st

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What you'll learn

1 **(00:02:14) Intro: Managing speaking anxiety**
2 **(00:06:27) Visualization for desensitization**
3 **(00:10:57) Dare to be dull & reframe anxiety as excitement**
4 **(00:16:12) Mantras & normalizing anxiety**
5 **(00:23:22) Distraction, breathing, & presence techniques**
6 **(00:34:37) Spontaneous speaking: Prepare via mindset & structures**
7 **(00:45:31) Small talk mastery**

+ Full timestamped outline available in the app

Show Notes

Matt Abrahams is a renowned communication expert, with decades of teaching, coaching, and consulting experience. At Stanford University, he teaches a business school class on strategic communication. Beyond academia, he’s a sought-after keynote speaker and consultant, guiding presenters from IPO road shows to prestigious platforms like TED, the World Economic Forum, and the United Nations. His acclaimed podcast, Think Fast, Talk Smart, garners millions of listeners, and his book, Think Faster, Talk Smarter, equips speakers with practical skills for impromptu success. With a previous bestseller, Speaking Up Without Freaking Out, Matt has empowered countless individuals to speak confidently and authentically. In our conversation, we discuss:

• The concept of “daring to be dull”

• The power of visualization to desensitize oneself to speaking situations

• Managing negative self-talk

• The WHAT structure for delivering toasts (why we are here, how you are connected, anecdote, thanks)

• The ADD structure for Q&As (answer, detailed example, describe relevance)

• Breathing techniques to reduce anxiety, such as the double exhale

• Concrete speaking structures like What? So What? Now What? and the Four I’s (information, impact, invitation, implications)

• Much more

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