IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson
IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson

Some Friendships Need to Go with Issa Rae [From the Archives]

August 21, 2026

AI Summary

5 min read

This episode of IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson features Issa Rae, and the central question is not about how to make friends but about what happens when friendships end—and what those endings reveal about the different ways men and women build relationships in the first place. The conversation is organized around a listener letter from a 32-year-old woman named Eva, whose friend Kristen ended their friendship after a family tragedy, citing a long-standing imbalance. From there, the three speakers unpack the mechanics of friendship, the gendered patterns of emotional investment, and what it means to be honest with yourself about the kind of friend you actually are.

The core difference: sociology vs. carpentry

The most striking framework in the episode is the distinction between how women and men tend to structure friendships. Michelle Obama describes female friendships as a form of "sociology"—a constant, deep excavation of each other's lives. "When I'm with my friends, and this was true at all levels, we're never just gonna throw a ball," she says. "I want to know why, how? Tell me more." This creates intimacy, but it also creates vulnerability: when a friendship ends, the hurt is enormous because so much of yourself has been shared.

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What you'll learn

  • 1 (01:01) **Welcome and Host Banter** - Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson open the episode with lighthearted clothing and driving jokes.
  • 2 (02:48) **Setting Up the Topic: Friendship Differences Between Men and Women** - Craig and Michelle introduce the episode’s central theme: falling out of friendship and how men and women approach friendships differently.
  • 3 (07:21) **Introducing Guest Issa Rae** - Craig and Michelle welcome Issa Rae, creator and star of *Insecure*, as the episode’s expert guest.
  • 4 (09:09) **Issa’s Restaurant Origin Story and Friendship Breakup** - Issa explains how a failed night out with her best friend led her to open a restaurant, and then shares a painful friendship breakup from her past.
  • 5 (14:03) **Listener Letter: Eva’s Unbalanced Friendship** - A listener letter is read aloud, describing a friendship that felt imbalanced from the start and ended abruptly after a tragedy.
  • 6 (16:36) **Panel Reacts: Women vs. Men on Friendship Depth** - Michelle, Issa, and Craig discuss how women’s friendships are more sociologically complex and therefore more painful when they end.
  • 7 (23:24) **Defining Imbalance in Friendship** - The panel dissects what “imbalance” really means, distinguishing between natural ebb-and-flow and unhealthy one-sidedness.

+ Full timestamped outline available in the app

Guests on this episode

Show Notes

This week we are throwing it back with a re-release of one of IMO's very first episodes! Issa Rae is an acclaimed actor, producer, writer, and restaurateur—but she’s also a student of modern adult friendships. She joins Michelle and Craig to answer a question from a listener who is struggling with the unexpected end of a long-term friendship. Issa asks why male friendships are so weird and shares lessons from a friendship falling out. Michelle offers lessons on how to maintain connections throughout life, and Craig takes a stand for the fellas – who, Issa and Michelle claim, have no idea how to use emojis to express actual emotion.

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IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson