He Needs To Divorce Her | Financial Audit

August 10, 2026

AI Summary

5 min read

He chased her down the hall after she tried to leave. She grabbed a fork. He laughed. Another time, she says he pinned her down and slapped her while drunk. Later, she admits to punching him in the face — multiple times, in front of their son. He punched her back. She choked him. He got the gun. She went for a knife. The cops came. She went to jail. This is the marriage of Mike and Mailen, a couple from Tomball, Texas, who came on Financial Audit to talk about money and instead laid out a decade of mutual physical abuse, financial collapse, and a household running on hope and VA disability.

The Business That Isn't One

Mike owns a pet waste removal company with two employees. He says it makes about $15,000 a month. But he is behind on payroll, behind on his mortgage, behind on electricity, and has no idea where the money goes. He recently read the book Profit First and decided to start taking an "owner's withdrawal" of 47% of revenue — before paying his employees. The host, Caleb, is blunt: "If you hire people, they're your responsibility before you pay yourself." Mike's business checking account is a mess of personal spending: energy drinks, Uber Eats, Chick-fil-A, bubble tea, Amazon, Disney+, and a $233 charge for "Young Chef's Academy" — all deducted as business expenses. The IRS, Caleb warns, will eventually destroy them.

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What you'll learn

1 Timestamped Outline
2 (00:21) **Introduction of Mike and Mailen** - The couple introduces themselves: Mike (36), Mailen (33), from Tomball, Texas, with six kids between them and a seventh potentially on the way.
3 (06:10) **Mike's Income and Business Confusion** - Mike claims to take home $9,000 a month but reveals he hasn't been paying himself consistently and just separated business from personal finances.
4 (09:56) **Mailen's Role and the Spreadsheet Conflict** - Mailen explains she built and maintained a spreadsheet for four years to track finances, but Mike refused to engage with it.
5 (12:23) **Business Financial Mismanagement Revealed** - Mike is taking a 47% owner's draw from the business while behind on payroll, a margin that makes no sense for a low-margin poop-scooping operation.
6 (16:29) **History of Domestic Violence Begins** - Mailen describes the first physical incident: she tried to wake Mike to watch the kids while she worked, he refused, and she began hitting him after he got in her face.
7 (21:39) **Mike's Drunk Violence Against Mailen** - Mailen describes the second incident: Mike got drunk, pinned her down, and started slapping her after she told him to go to bed.

+ Full timestamped outline available in the app

Show Notes

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