Begin Again Moments: Growing Up With A Narcissistic Parent

September 20, 2026

AI Summary

5 min read

Your mother left you in a strange town at eight years old with no money and no way home, and you had to figure it out yourself. That story, shared by a guest on Begin Again with Davina McCall, opens a conversation about growing up with a parent who may be a narcissist — and the quiet, lasting damage it does to a child’s sense of self. The guest, now an adult, reflects on how that experience and later being kicked out at 15 shaped him, while also questioning whether his mother’s behavior was narcissism or the chaos of alcoholism. The episode carefully distinguishes between the two, explores how children adapt to survive, and outlines what real recovery looks like.

What Narcissistic Parenting Looks Like — and What It Isn’t

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What you'll learn

1 Timestamped Navigation Outline
2 (00:04) **Childhood Abandonment Story** - Davina shares a vivid memory of being left alone in a town at age eight after an argument with her mother
3 (02:21) **Kicked Out at 15 After Father's Death** - Davina recounts being thrown out of the house immediately after her father died
4 (04:00) **Not Knowing What a Narcissist Was** - Davina reveals she didn't understand her mother's behavior as narcissistic until adulthood
5 (05:50) **Mirroring and Survival Mechanisms** - Davina explains how children adapt their identity to survive around difficult parents
6 (06:14) **Distinguishing Narcissism from Addiction** - Davina questions whether her mother was a narcissist or just an alcoholic
7 (08:20) **The Sibling Who Lost Her Identity** - Davina discusses how her sister, who lived with their mother full-time, became a compulsive liar

+ Full timestamped outline available in the app

Show Notes

In this episode of Begin Again Moments, Simon Squibb and psychotherapist Kathleen Saxton examine how the behaviour of a parent can shape the person you become long after childhood is over.

Simon shares the reality of growing up with a mother he describes as a narcissist, from being left to find his own way home at eight years old to being kicked out of home at 15, shortly after his father died. Now, as a parent himself, he reflects on the experiences he once accepted as normal.

Kathleen helps unpack what happens psychologically when a child grows up around narcissism, addiction or unpredictable behaviour. As Davina reflects on her own relationship with her mother, they discuss why children learn to keep the peace, adapt themselves to their parents and sometimes lose touch with who they really are in the process.

Both conversations examine the difficult work of revisiting childhood as an adult: recognising when something wasn’t okay, understanding why we instinctively defend our parents, and beginning to reconnect with the person we were before we learned to adapt in order to be accepted.

To hear the full conversations, watch the complete episodes on YouTube or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

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