Episode 387: How to Make the Most of Your Singleness

A caller named Ella asks a question many single Christians wrestle with: she is content in her singleness and does not want a relationship right now, but she feels pressure from the church to prepare for marriage. She wonders if something is wrong with her for not desiring marriage, and whether she should be using this season to pray over a future husband or focus instead on her identity as a daughter of God. The hosts respond by affirming that there is nothing wrong with her, and they build a case for treating singleness not as a waiting room for marriage but as a gift to be used well.

Singleness as a gift, not a problem

The core argument of the episode is that singleness is not a problem to be solved but a gift to be stewarded. The host points to Scripture—specifically 1 Corinthians 7 and Matthew 19—to show that Paul and Jesus both affirm singleness as a legitimate and even preferable calling for those who can receive it. Paul writes, “I wish you were as I am” (single), and Jesus says some “live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom.” The key phrase is “for the sake of the kingdom.” Singleness is not a gift because it is easy or because it allows someone to avoid responsibility. It is a gift because it frees a person to pursue kingdom work without the natural constraints of marriage and family.